How do you create blissful habits

I wish you happiness, good health, and a lifetime of giggles and silliness.

I’m curious to know what you do to create and stick to healthier habits?  I used to have a tough time with this.  I’d try to practice yoga regularly, but I’d only make it on my mat once or twice a month.  And I wanted to read more, but I’d often end up binge-watching a show instead.

But guess what? I’ve found something that’s helped me build and maintain better habits.  I call them The Four Intentions (the author calls them 4 rules, but I’m not a fan of rules).  I stumbled upon this concept while reading the book with my friend, Gala, called The Atomic Habits.

Developing healthier habits, even by just 1% each day, can lead to remarkable changes over time-and the same applies to unhealthy habits.  

When Liam was younger, I used to have a croissant and a mocha every day (okay, sometimes a glass of wine at night too), which gradually led to weight gain.  After moving to Colorado, where good croissants are hard to find, I stopped eating them.  I also switched from mochas to drip coffee or tea and replaced my nightly wine with more yoga.  These small changes have helped me lose a significant amount of weight and increase my savings.

Tiny shifts in habits, compounded over time, can make a huge difference.

James Clear, the author of Atomic Habits, writes about how he transformed his life-from struggling to becoming a successful athlete, author, and a happier, more connected person.  He identifies four key principles to create and maintain new habits:

Make it Obvious

Make it Attractive

Make it Easy

Make it Satisfying

I’ve been working with these four intentions to have a more steady yoga practice, save money, keep my home and car tidy, make more art, and be more active.  These intentions have significantly helped me integrate these wonderful habits into my daily routine. 

1. Make it Obvious


We are more likely to do a habit if we have a set day, time, and place for the activity. I kept wanting to do yoga more but didn’t know when or where. Often the place I do yoga was filled with toys, so I tried the Make it Obvious technique. I started to clean the night before, put my yoga mat out, chose a 30-Day Challenge on Yoga Anytime, and committed to doing yoga right after I woke up for 20 minutes.

I’ve been doing yoga almost every day for the past couple of months, and I feel sooooo good.



Another cool part of the Make it Obvious technique is Habit Stacking, where you add a habit into something you’re already doing. For instance, every time I leave my car, I pick up a few pieces of trash or various items to contribute to maintaining a clean (or at least a cleaner) car.   

2. Make it attractive





A great way to start and sustain a habit is to do Temptation Bundling: pair your new habit with something you want to do.  I love listening to podcasts so when I clean every morning I put on a podcast and now I actually enjoy cleaning. 

Another way to make it attractive is to join a culture where your desired behavior is normal.  

When I moved back to Colorado I joined one of my favorite teacher’s class, Leslie Glenn’s Wall Yoga class.  I loved committing to her class because it was small, we chatted and laughed, and I did the class the whole year my son was in preschool.  By committing to classes, it motivates me to go even when I am tired and don’t want to go.  I want to show up to see my yoga friends and to keep my commitment to my teacher.   

3. Make it Easy


I love Make it Easy!  Last winter I was scared to start snowboarding again. I had broken my leg skiing the previous year, and the thought of it made me nervous.  I started by taking only one or two runs with my snowboard a few times a week.  I often ended up on my heels instead of carving onto my toes then heels.  I kept practicing, and gradually, I started carving more and more.  And finally I carved all the way down the mountain, regaining my snowboarding skills.

James suggests starting any new habit by only doing it for two minutes or if that is too short then start with a small amount for you then gradually increase your habit over time.  I started with 5 minutes of yoga everyday and now I do about 30-60 minutes a day.  

“You cannot improve a habit you don’t have.”

4. Make it Satisfying

(This picture is after the game: Left, Right, Center, and my nephew, sister, and Liam won)

Whenever you start a new habit, treat yourself to something special right away. My math teacher in high school suggested investing $50 a month into retirement. By the time I was 65, I’d have enough to retire comfortably. I thought it was a great idea, but I didn’t invest because between going out to eat with friends or saving for 47 years in the future, I chose to enjoy the present moment. 

Now, I realize that if I had given myself small rewards for investing, like using a portion of my money for eating out then doing more free activities with friends like cooking together at our houses or having potluck picnics, I would have had way more money in my retirement then I do currently.

My trick for saving money now is I always deposit money into my savings account on Saturdays, and it can be $5-200. My reward is simply seeing my savings grow. Having savings gives me the ability to take time off, go on vacation, fix my car, and so much more. Some people enjoy an immediate reward such as putting money in their fun account as well, which they can use for anything that brings them joy.

To break bad habits, we need the same positive intentions in reverse. I’ve been reducing my phone scrolling, eating less junk food, and spending less money by using these intentions:


1. Make it invisible
2. Make it unattractive
3. Make it difficult
4. Make it unsatisfying


1.  Make it invisible by removing the cues from your environment.

 
When I lived in Olympia I didn’t have internet at my house so I forced myself to do other things besides watch shows or go on the internet (I had a dumb phone then too).  I started making soap, bath salts, chakra spritzers, wrote a cookbook, and read a lot more.  When I didn’t have a choice about watching a show or going on the internet I got creative.

Now I live with two guys who love to watch movies and so It’s harder for me to keep the television and internet  off.  I often put out a game for Liam and I to play in the morning (we love to play Life and Uno). And to avoid the temptation to turn on a show, I try to stay out of the condo for most of the day.

2. Make it unattractive by reframing your mindset.

I’ve been cutting back on drinking because I’ve been getting cold sores, and I feel so good these days that I don’t want drinking to dull that feeling. Plus, I’m saving my money for other things that I enjoy. Drinking can make chatting more fun, but more than one glass can make me feel less present and not as good the next day.  

I’ve switched to drinking tea, coconut water, or kombucha most of the time. When I think about drinking, I realize that I could put that money in my savings, feel better with a glass of lemonade or tea, or do some yoga instead. And guess what? Doing yoga has the same effect except I feel even better the next day.

3.  Make it Difficult by increasing the steps between you and your challenging habit.

 
I usually keep my son entertained all day by taking him to places without TVs. We explore nature, go for hikes, slide down slides, and enjoy the lakes. He has a wonderful time and never asks to watch a show. But when we get home, it’s the first thing he asks for.

I’m still working on making it harder to watch shows at home by only having videos or DVDs, but I need my partner on the same page. Some people unplug their TVs to make it harder to turn them on, and some people even hide their TVs in their closet.     

4. Make it unsatisfying.

Some of us need negative consequences to stick to new habits. When I played college soccer our coach would make the whole team do sprints if we were late to practice, so we were almost never late.  

When I took a business class in Olympia we had to write a $300 dollar check but they would only cash it if we didn’t write our business plan so almost all of us wrote our business plans.  

Some people do accountability buddies where they write a contract with them stating they will pay them $100 if they miss a workout or whatever they are committed to.  I haven’t tried this technique yet but I’m a penny pincher so I’m sure it would help.  

What habits do you have that really benefit you?  Some of my friends workout every morning at the gym, others are so good at saving money, some don’t have televisions and have so many wonderful hobbies.  These are all habits that inspire me.  

Do you have habits that you would like to replace?  I have friends who scroll the internet off and on all day but they aren’t sure what to replace it with.  I have friends who drink wine every evening to relax but complain about low energy and weight gain.  No habit is bad but maybe too much of certain habits can drain our energy and joy.  

Some Replacement Ideas:

Habit:                 
Scrolling internet.    
Instead:
Call friends, read, write a letter, go on a walk with a friend.
Habit:
Watching too much t.v. 
Instead:
go to the gym, do yoga, read a book, take a hike, take a nap. 

If you feel inspired to shift some of your habits here is James Clear’s free workbook.





To decrease a Bad Habit:1. Make it invisible
2. Make it unattractive
3. Make it difficult
4. Make it unsatisfying

To Increase a Helpful Habit:1. Make it Obvious2. Make Attractive3. Make it Easy4. Make it Satisfying  

Let me know any tips you have for creating and keeping better habits and I’ll share that with this article on my blog(I’ll try to post this article to my blog this evening and you can post tips or thoughts to ponder there). 

May you be happy, May you be free from suffering,May you have peace, May you have giggles,



Vanessa 





ColoradoMondays 7-8:15pm
Yin Yoga with Sound Healing
Summit Sol Yoga, Dillon

Saturdays 9-10am
Slow Flow Yoga
Meta, Breckenridge

Sundays 1-6:30pm
Massage
Blissful Life, Dillon

WashingtonFall (details coming soon)Yin Yoga with Thai MassageMassage at Westside Wellness ​